Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
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