How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
