Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize