Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize