I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
third nipple confirmed
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
