But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
