I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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