I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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