I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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