I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
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