let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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