whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
