Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
