I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
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