C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
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