I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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