i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
