I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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