yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
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He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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