ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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