Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
