Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I won't apologize to a one balled man
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
