Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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