I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize
