i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
