New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
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