I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
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