lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
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