you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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