At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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