she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
