I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Randomize
