I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
It's never too late to be topless.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
