It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
I have already put on my inside pants.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
