i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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