Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
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