Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Randomize
