Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
