Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
i came on her dog
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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