I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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