she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize
