OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
