My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Randomize
