He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
