That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
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