they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Randomize
