smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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