doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
