my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
The convent might be a nice break from real life
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
