I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
he thought i was a dude.
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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